There are certain side effects of pregnancy that I fully expected when I realized that I was cooking one in the oven. Cravings of pickles and ice cream, bouts of nausea, ballooning boobs and a bloated belly were squarely on my radar as surfacing symptoms. What I wasn't prepared for was the sudden plummet in my IQ. Pregnancy brain--it comes on fast and it comes on strong.
I've read a bunch of garbage about whether pregnancy brain "really exists," and that "research data" does not support the notion, but I will tell you that it sure as hell does.
In my own case, annoyed requests of "Mrs. Bittenbender, can you please take your attendance?" have become frequent pleas coming from the loudspeaker in my classroom. I have on several occasions left the house sans purse, and need I mention the backwards sundress incident?
Last weekend there was a lost car situation. After a grocery trip to Whole Foods, I paraded around the first floor of the parking garage with my loaded shopping cart, searching desperately for the location of my parked car, only to realize (after examining every possible parking space) that I had parked on the second floor.
Yesterday, I was convinced that I must have been being punk'd by the gas station. I decided to stop and fill up the tank after work. The entire distance between my school and the gas station I thought about the two partially used Shell gift cards in my wallet (I remembered it this time). Sweet! There is a Shell station right on the way. My fill up wouldn't cost a thing. I pulled into the station and up to the pump, and swiped the first of my gift cards. Authorizing, authorizing, authorizing...went on and on until I canceled the transaction to try the other gift card. Same result. Exasperated, fussy, and annoyed, I tried both cards twice more. I glared at the cashier inside the foodmart. I thought, why isn't that fool coming to help me? Clearly, there is something wrong with this machine. I looked back at the gas pump searching for some sort of clue as to what could possibly be the problem.
And then I saw it.
A sticker on the pump.
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Megan likes to leave Post-It-Notes around so she remembers things. Karen has a whole bunch if ya need some...lol.
ReplyDeleteYour friend Karin passed your blog on to me... being that I am myself 13 weeks pregnant and a teacher I found it bloody hysterical and completely on the mark! Read the whole log of posts in one sitting and didn't stop chuckling - Well done!
ReplyDeleteOh good! I'm so glad you like it! It's been enjoyable for me to write...I plan to keep up on it once Bitty is born, so keep reading!
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