An (un)Civil War

If there is one thing that I've learned about parenting in the past year, it's that as soon as one issue is resolved, another promptly pops up in its place.

When Bitty learned that feeding herself was quite an enjoyable activity, she also discovered that throwing food on the floor could be as equally enjoyable.  When she finally accepted that whole milk could be a tasty and satisfying beverage, she soon became a fiending milk addict. 

Throughout the past year, the problems with poop just won't go away.  Different, yes, but always involving poop.  We've had issues with no poop, runny poop, leaking poop, and turtle-head poop.  There has been squirting poop, hairy poop, buried-treasure poop, and poop at quite inopportune times and places.

Lately, it has been poop removal that is causing me grief.  As soon as Bitty learned to roll over she decided that lying on her back for a diaper change was a glaring waste of time, and so as soon as she realizes what is about to happen, the wheels are turning and she is planning her escape.  For months I was able to bide some time with songs, tickles, raspberries, silly noises, special toys, my phone--but Bitty is on to me now, none of my distractions are working, and I am out of ideas. Diaper changes have become a battle of wills, me vs. Bitty.  I am at my wits end.  Poopy changes result in me cleaning poop off of the floor, the changing pad, the rug, and even the dresser.  I even find myself thinking how long can I let her sit in this before it's considered negligence?  Avoidance, I just don't even want to deal with the conflict.  The only semi-solution that I have found is speed.  If I have my materials ready, I can sometimes get the diaper off with one hand, a few wipes of the behiney with the other, while grabbing an ankle to prevent escape with the first hand, in enough time to prevent disaster.  When can we start potty training again?